I seem to get this, almost queasy feeling, every year around pride. There’s a lot that happens. There’s a lot of people, a lot of parties, a lot of events- just, a lot. I get a little anxietal from it all. In years past, I’ve gone by myself, single, and met new friends and had a blast. I’ve gone with people i was kind of seeing, I’ve gone with friends, and I’ve had mixed experiences with all of those situations. This year is the earliest I’ve started celebrating, starting yesterday, continuing today, and tomorrow I’ll be participating in the first annual Pride 5k. I was going to go to a pool party afterwards, but it’s at Josh and Jordan’s place. I normally have a pretty good read on people, but with them, I honestly have no clue if they really like seeing me or not. They’ll smile, make small talk, hug and all that, but I still have this aching feeling that they don’t really want me around, and I’m not 100% sure why that is. I ran into them tonight, and I mentioned their party to Josh, and he seemed surprised that I was going to be there. When I asked him if it was okay that o was going, it seemed like he was just being polite by saying of course it was. When I got to talking to Jordan, he made no mention of their party. I said I was gonna see them tomorrow, and he looked confused. So I just dropped the topic, and got my hint. It sucks, because it sounds like it’s gonna be a good time, with fun people. Guess I’ll find something else to go to.