Self-Doubt and Confidence

yin yang

What they say is true: Confidence is sexy. It’s easy to get through life with that mantra, without looking much further into it, because there’s a lot of truth in that statement. It’s hard to argue that people who seem to always know exactly what they want don’t have a certain allure to them. But there’s something to be said for self-doubt. Self-doubt is like our own check and balance system. Without some self-doubt along the way, we’d never question our decisions. And I’m going to let you in on a not-so-secret secret: those that have never doubted their decisions truly aren’t confident; they’re simply foolish.

Second-guessing, self-doubt, double-backing, re-thinking- they all point to the same thing, which is truly exploring all of your options before making a decision. When you go to the grocery store, is every single item you’ve considered buying in your cart when you check out? Of course not. While shopping, surely you’ve gone to the length of heading back to the other side of the store to put something back because you changed your decision? I know I certainly have. There was a time when this used to embarrass me, but not anymore. I’ve realized over time that, as smooth and sexy as swift decisions look from the outside, it’s hard to pull off in real life. Pulling off effort-less takes a lot of effort. To come off smooth, you have to roll-out a lot of wrinkles and rough edges.

“Perfect doesn’t exist”

What I mean by all this nonsense is really quite simple- perfect doesn’t exist. The illusion of perfection only exists because of the numerous imperfections that are just beneath the surface. When you go to your favorite theater to see a performance, you’re seeing the illusion of perfection- the performers have spent countless hours rehearsing and practicing. They’ve worked through faults of their own and through faults of their cast-mates. They even know what kind of mistakes might STILL pop-up during a show, so that they can work together to form that seamless, perfect-looking show that you paid to see, with you none-the-wiser that mistakes were still part of the show.

The same concept can be applied on a broader-scope within our lives. Whether it’s a major purchase, a job, a lifestyle change, a new diet, your relationship, the living room paint color, even your friends- it goes on and on. There’s no shame in re-thinking a decision. There’s nothing wrong with doubting yourself. In the end, you’ll do one of two things- you’ll either make a better decision that improves your life, or you’ll find renewed confidence in your original decision.

So with that in mind, it’s important to always uplift each other as we make new decisions on our journey of life. We’re all human, we all make mistakes, and we all face similar predicaments in life. No one wakes up one day and knows exactly what they want and how they’re going to get it- every little step along the way is a process, just like it has been for you, and for me.




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